May 19, 2014
Looks like I paid for yesterday. Back to 2 Tramadol this morning. I am still working on how much is too much. Now that I am on my way to my physical healing I am back to my psychological healing. Today's Day 2 meditation from Depok Chopra's "Finding your Flow" focused on "you" as the source of your happiness. During this I revisited the awareness that happiness is wherever you are, not a destination or a place. While a place can be a sanctuary for this healing it is not always possible to be there. Therefore it is imperative that I take the time to look inward for this happiness or peace and stay in the moment. I am the only one that can create this. I cannot look to others. If I seek a sanctuary, if I seek healing, if I seek peace, if I seek happiness I have to work it find it. I keep revisiting Lao Tze's
If you are depressed you are living in the past
If you are anxious you re living in the future
If you are content you are living in the present
While I know this I have to keep reminding myself.
One of the things I realize is that while I know much I have not really internalized or masters it yet. I thought that all of this would have been applied throughout this journey. Only now I am coming back to it. My physical distractions clouded this knowledge. Rather than being disappointed in myself, I am learning from it. I find this realization interesting because it intersects with Beattie's reading for today..."Don't be Afraid of Making Mistakes". This is an important reminder that everything happens for a reason and we learn the most form our struggles and failures rather than our successes. We just need to be aware and open to the lesson that is offering itself.
Stay tuned!
Namaste
Donna
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